Hello everyone, welcome back to another summing up! Luís here and today I will share some of my opinions about teenage serious relationships.
Thankfuly me and Ângela are in a relationship for over a year now, almost two actually and yes some of you may be thinking ”pfff that ain’t that long” but please remember that a lot of people with our age (currently 19) are not cappable of having a relationship for this long.There can be a lot of reasons to this, for starters, the coupple can be just that way; both persons are not interested in a long term relationship and it’s their right to do so. However sometimes things aren’t like this: Some coupples suffer a lot for being young and it’s because of those couples that this post exists.
First of all, it can be scary to have a long term relation especially if you’re young, and all I have to say is: don’t be. What matters is that both you and your partner are happy and in love. Just take it easy and enjoy the ride, don’t do anything rushing if you feel you’re not ready, either meeting parents, friends, posting on facebook (seriously) or sex; all of these can wait and so will your partner if he loves you. Secondly, it’s the pressure you can feel, your parents may say that you are too young to have this relation: well you are not, relations aren’t measured through your age but through your love and understanding towards the other one and that’s what matters in the end.
Lastly (as far as I remember): society. Society tends to make people more childish than they really are and in a way we are all brainwashed to believe so; imagine a coupple of a boy and a girl, both 13 year old. THEY ARE SO YOUNG RIGHT?? True, they really are, our first thought is ”they won’t last.” well you don’t know that, there are couples out there of 12 year olds that date for 2 years, yes, years. Do they care? Maybe. Should they? Not at all. If you feel that you are ready then just go. Me and Ângela had problems about our age because our friends aren’t in a real serious relationship (some are now) however, we talked and we kept together. That’s what you should do, remember to always tell the truth to each other, to love each other and to talk about everything that you need to.
Ângela here! I feel like Luís has said pretty much everyhing. Long relationships are certainly tricky, even for people who love each other. I’ve said this to Luís hundreds of times and i’ll repeat it – Love isn’t everything. If it was, I would be dating that little guy from my nursery days. Doesn’t make sense,right? So don’t feel bad if things aren’t working and you need space. During our almost 2-year relationship,we’ve separated twice and we don’t regret at all – we’ve grown up during those periods and understood the importance of our relationship. We only give value to those we’ve lost (although we sort of knew we would come back).
Another thing that I would like to talk about is that feeling of we might missing something because we’re young and in a serious relationship. I’ll be honest here, you might lose something. The positive thing is by losing something, you might win another experience that might just be good as the lost one of even better. The trick to make things work is to frame your dreams in his and vice versa. You want to eat pasta and he wants to watch a movie? Eat pasta and watch a movie (terrible example but you guys get it). You don’t need to give up any of your dreams as long as you don’t give up from his/hers. Relationship are made of 2people (duh.) and so it has to be built like this. We’re in college and I don’t feel like we’re missing anything since we like to share the experiences.
To finish this topic – perfection takes time. And patience.
See you guys next time, hope you enjoyed it!
The Summing Up Team